A doctor's estimate of roughly six months has a way of clarifying what matters. Bank balances and statements start to feel secondary to a simpler question: does everyone I love know what I want? The details families regret afterward are rarely about money. They're about not knowing which hymn Dad wanted, whether Mom hoped to be buried next to her sister, or who was supposed to get the piano. None of this requires an attorney. It requires a conversation, written down, before it's too late to have it.

Start with a simple letter addressed to whoever will be making decisions. Cover the basics: burial or cremation, a preferred funeral home or place of service, music or readings that matter to you, and who you want involved in planning. Then go further. Note who should receive sentimental items a will often glosses over — the wedding ring, the tool collection, the handwritten recipes. To make this easier, we offer a Financial Letter of Instruction template, free to download at millerwm.com/downloadable-resources.

Have the harder conversation too. If you plan to divide things unequally among your children — perhaps because one provided years of caregiving — explain your reasoning while you're able to. Families rarely fight over money as much as they fight over feeling blindsided. A short conversation now can prevent years of resentment later.

Here's something that surprises most people: your will does not control who inherits your 401(k), IRA, life insurance policy, or any account with a named beneficiary. Those assets pass directly to whoever is listed on the beneficiary form, regardless of what your will says. If an ex-spouse is still listed on an old policy, or you never named anyone at all, that form wins.

A wish nobody can find isn't a wish that gets honored. Give your named executor, your power of attorney agent, your closest family member, and your advisor a copy of your letter and a list of your key documents — and tell them exactly where the originals are kept. Six months is enough time to put all of this in place, but it isn't time to waste. Start with the conversation, then confirm the paperwork. Your family will remember how clear you made things far longer than they'll remember the size of any account.